I’d always heard that the best way to maintain a
friendship was to avoid two topics – politics and religion. I believe it was
something I heard Jimmy Stewart and Henry Fonda agreed to, as a means of
maintaining their friendship – although I can’t absolutely confirm that. It
seemed like good advice, and one I’ve followed, well, religiously, however, in
today’s world, it seems religion has forced its way to the forefront of many of
our lives whether we want it to or not.
I grew up in a diverse world, with many friends of
various ethnic groups, and not once was their religion, or the religion their
family practiced in their homes, an issue. What mattered most to my group of friends
was whether or not we enjoyed spending time with each other? Of course, I also
grew up in a world where actor and sports stars salaries were not reported, nor
something we concerned ourselves with – what mattered to us was the
entertainment value they provided us.
Times have changed, and whether I like it or not,
religion affects all of our lives. To merely utter the word ‘Muslim,’ has an
impact. It is a word that immediately has an emotional impact to many – some good,
some bad; with a fear they don’t quite understand.
What
does it mean to you?
Then
again, what does ‘Christianity’ mean to you?
I grew up Christian, although not in a Church-going
household. To marry, I took my Muslim vows, out of respect for my father-in-law
and his wishes, and was married by an Imam – a beautiful ceremony that carried
the same emotional and spiritual weight, as if I’d been married in a Christian,
Catholic or Jewish ceremony. All I wanted was that the ceremony had a spiritual
aspect to it – and it did.
Today our world is in turmoil. Radical Muslim fanatics
– and the distinction here is ‘radical’ and ‘fanatics’ – are killing in the
name of religion, and seeing how their actions garner headlines, more and more
their behaviour is coming to unfortunately define the word ‘Muslim’ in many of
our minds.
Can we honestly believe that the average Muslim,
working hard to provide for his or her family and live a good life, is out to
harm anyone?
I interact every day with two diehard Christian
gentlemen and one Muslim gentleman. While I believe in a higher power, I’m not
necessarily enamoured with organized religions, feeling they are the creation
of humans, have been perverted over the years by humans to their benefit, and
because they are ‘human’, as I’ve stated, definitely not infallible. At the
same time, if any particular religion provides you with comfort, I see no harm
in believing, especially if it helps you strive to be a better person and love
your fellow man.
Of the two Christian gentlemen I work with, one I
would describe as a ‘fanatic’ in his own right – although not a violent
fanatic. He’s told me every day that the end is coming and that I’m going to
pay. He’s an angry and unpleasant man, who doesn’t get along with anyone, and
is petty and, no doubt, vindictive; he believes, without ever asking me, that
I’m a sinner, and that when God returns, he will be at God’s side, and the rest
of us will be doomed to Hell. The funny part is he almost seems to take great
delight in the fact that many of his fellow human beings will be doomed. He
believes God is all knowing and all seeing, but feels that the hatred and anger
in his heart will somehow be overlooked – as if somehow he can hide that from his
Creator.
The second Christian gentleman is more civilized and
reasonable, however, from time to time, is determined to prove his faith’s
worth, by pointing out flaws in the other co-workers faith, him being the
Muslim. He is a good person, but you can see, that when it comes to
Christianity, in his own way, he is as unwavering in the belief he is right, as
the fanatical Christian.
As for the Muslim gentleman, a truly pleasant fellow,
he is quiet, although when asked about his faith is more than willing to talk
to you about it, and explain it, without putting down other’s beliefs.
Possibly, he is aware of the impact the word ‘Muslim’ now carries with many,
based on groups like Isis who have co-opted it in their bid for power, and just
chooses to remain quiet. I’m sure in his own way, he is as certain of his faith
as his two Christian co-workers; he just doesn’t force his beliefs on others.
Who
is right and who is wrong?
The truth is we can’t know – at least not now. The
fanatical Christian gentleman keeps trying to prove to me all in the Bible is
true – scientifically proven. Of course, he always falls short of that
standard, although he doesn’t think so himself. My argument with him has been
that I don’t need solid proof of anything; I thought the beauty of believing
was in having ‘faith’, believing in something greater than us despite a lack of
evidence.
Religion has taken front and center in a lot of our
lives – more so than ever before. Rather than accepting people based on their
character, we’re giving too much weight in what they believe spiritually. And
the fact is, like I mentioned above, no matter how much they believe, or in
what they believe, we don’t know what the truth really is.
Am I to believe that when I die, I’ll arrive at the
Pearly Gates, having lived – hopefully – a good life, say, as a Catholic, and
St. Peter will ask me what my religion is, and despite having led that good
charitable life, when I say, “Catholic,” he’s going to say, “Sorry, your wrong!
It was Jewish. Straight to Hell with you!” Maybe, instead, I’ll find a St.
Peter guarding those gates, who instead will give me a small, wry smile and
say, “You did your best to be the best person you could be. You weren’t perfect
but you were all right. You believed in what you needed to give your life
purpose, and in doing so, allowed bygones to be bygones. Just having faith,
faith in something more, that was all we asked.”
If I die, and the atheists are right, I’ll just fade
to black and never know I ever existed. I don’t believe that will be the case.
When I die, I imagine than, the unknown will all be sorted out, and I’ll know
the truth, whatever it may be. That day is inevitable and no matter what I do,
I can’t avoid it.
I believe the religion we all should embrace is
‘tolerance.’ It’s important to take the anger and violence out of religion, and
accept that it is impossible to ever have a world where everyone believes in
one thing. Much of what we believe is similar. We must also remember that no
matter what we believe, there are those who believe the same, and will position
it to benefit them, even if that means promoting hatred as part of that agenda.
Muslim, Christian, Catholic, Jewish, whatever you believe, if that belief stems
from love and the desire to contribute to our world in a positive way, using
tolerance and understanding as part of that belief, please believe. Faith and spirituality make us all stronger, but remember,
never let your faith devolve into anger or hatred, as in doing so, you are not
honoring that faith, but corrupting it.
As for me, I’ll readily admit I know nothing; I have
no answers, and probably never will. I have what I believe in and that will
have to suffice. I will continue judging people based on the content of their
character, and respect their beliefs, just so long as they practice those
beliefs without anger or hatred. Life is too short for those emotions.
And one day, hopefully a long time from now, I’ll
discover the answer...or just fade to black.